For Delphina. Is a friend of yours now painting pictures of young ladies in parks with scarves?
Saturday, February 13, 2010
Friday, February 12, 2010
Wednesday, February 10, 2010

It's only a matter of time before used ones start showing up on the streets of my city, probably on 20th between Sansom & Chestnut.
Labels:
accessories,
Condom Snuggie,
smugglers vs. snugglers
Monday, February 8, 2010
Saturday, February 6, 2010
A charming (?) sign that the apocalypse has already happened
With thanks to Billy Kemmler for sharing
Friday, February 5, 2010
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Saturday, January 23, 2010
Again comes the powder
This ingredient list reads like absurdist poetry, or cooking using oblique strategies:
Element meat block! Again comes the powder.
With thanks to Pollard for telling me where to find the vegetarian meat.
Thursday, January 21, 2010
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
GuitAir Face
I only watched the first minute, but the guitar player's faces are making me play air face guitar -- air guitar face? -- along with him.
...oh shit, fast-forwarding reveals woodwinds
Monday, January 11, 2010
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Friday, January 8, 2010
Thursday, January 7, 2010
Saturday, January 2, 2010
Friday, January 1, 2010
Tuesday, December 15, 2009
Monday, December 14, 2009
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Dazzle Ships I

Dazzle camouflage, also known as Razzle Dazzle or Dazzle painting, was a camouflage paint scheme used on ships, extensively during World War I and to a lesser extent in World War II.
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
Monday, December 7, 2009
Take off all your clothes and wear these lovely flowers
That is a lyric from the song I am listening to, "The Nymphs of Umtwalumi Wood" by Green Pavane.
I am alone.
I am alone.
Oh how I laugh and laugh
I just read this Thoreau quote:
"O how I laugh when I think of my vague indefinite riches"
But it looked to me like:
"O how I laugh when I think of my vaguely itchy vagina"
I don't know how that happened.
"O how I laugh when I think of my vague indefinite riches"
But it looked to me like:
"O how I laugh when I think of my vaguely itchy vagina"
I don't know how that happened.
Now, with even less self-respect... Philadelphia!
Courtesy of Titus Rochelle
Labels:
atrocities,
customer service,
hoagie,
Princess Di,
unfortunate
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Left behind when a hipster disappears into thin air
Okay, so he evaporated. The question is why: Sunlight? Forced to wash hair? Metabolized the last trace of PBR in his system?
Mind you don't go twirly on me!
Bezabor: a peculiar character. "He's a queer old bezabor."
Catch-talk: Trivial sayings. "There's a lot of catch talk in the Bible."
Do a dicker: To make a bargain. "You and I might do a dicker on him."
Innards: Guts. "There'll be a fire built on your innards down in Hell."
Notional: A little queer. "I'm notional that way."
Old apple in the wind: "His head was rolling all over his shoulders like an old apple in the wind."
Rangdangle: To beat up. "Klore intends to rangdangle you."
Rumple: To destroy. "I don't mean that a swaller is going to rumple your innards."
Sheltered honey: Pampered. "She was always a sheltered honey."
Spraddly: Apart. "We saw that his legs were spraddly and his back arched."
Tile: Silk hat. "The gloss of a man's tile is distinctive."
Twirly: Unbalanced. "He bumped his head and went twirly."
From Erie Canal Colloquial Expressions, by Jason Almus Russell
© 1930 The American Dialect Society
Catch-talk: Trivial sayings. "There's a lot of catch talk in the Bible."
Do a dicker: To make a bargain. "You and I might do a dicker on him."
Innards: Guts. "There'll be a fire built on your innards down in Hell."
Notional: A little queer. "I'm notional that way."
Old apple in the wind: "His head was rolling all over his shoulders like an old apple in the wind."
Rangdangle: To beat up. "Klore intends to rangdangle you."
Rumple: To destroy. "I don't mean that a swaller is going to rumple your innards."
Sheltered honey: Pampered. "She was always a sheltered honey."
Spraddly: Apart. "We saw that his legs were spraddly and his back arched."
Tile: Silk hat. "The gloss of a man's tile is distinctive."
Twirly: Unbalanced. "He bumped his head and went twirly."
From Erie Canal Colloquial Expressions, by Jason Almus Russell
© 1930 The American Dialect Society
Monday, November 30, 2009
*A centaur with wings is called a pteracentaur.*
One of many things you will learn (against your will) by perusing this set of manimals by flondo (trademark).
Thursday, November 26, 2009
Led Hoagie I & II
Good Hoagies Bad Hoagies
Babe I'm Gonna Leave Hoagie
You Shook Hoagie
Dazed and Confused and Hoagie
Your Hoagie is Gonna Come
Black Mountain Hoagie
Hoagie Breakdown
I Can't Quit You Hoagie
How Many More Hoagies
Whole Lotta Hoagie
What Is and What Should Never Be Hoagie
The Hoagie Song
Thank Hoagie
Hoagiebreaker
Living Loving Maid (She's Just a Hoagie)
Hoagie On
Moby Hoagie
Bring It On Hoagie
Thursday, November 19, 2009
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Saturday, November 14, 2009
Friday, November 13, 2009
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
The Cover Letter*
Between 3 p.m. and 7 p.m., mix the following:
1-3 beers
Pair of glasses even though they hurt your nose
Sip or two of whiskey or tequila
Microsoft Word
Old cover letter
Curriculum vitae
Battered ego
Mix well, suppress gag reflex, and try not to cry.
* Soundtrack provided by Stormy Pheathers

1-3 beers
Pair of glasses even though they hurt your nose
Sip or two of whiskey or tequila
Microsoft Word
Old cover letter
Curriculum vitae
Battered ego
Mix well, suppress gag reflex, and try not to cry.
* Soundtrack provided by Stormy Pheathers

Tuesday, November 10, 2009
I don't like the mushy butts
This is another Missy Elliott exclusive
its all for the love
but there is more things that keep a man satisfied(oh come on)
and i know the remedy just to cure him from
cheating even if he tried hey
pussy don't fail me now
i gotta turn this nigga out
so he don't want nobody else
but me and only me
pussy don't fail me now
i gotta turn this nigga out
so he don't want nobody else
but me and only me(only me)
i know he's a man and men have intentions(intentions)
to sleep with someone else(umm oh, oh)
but that's why when i make love to him
i'm ruling(come on)
try to give him my best(oh please) hey
pussy don't fail me now(fail me now)
i gotta turn this nigga out
so he don't want nobody else(no body)
but me and only me(ohhhhhh)
pussy don't fail me now (fail me now)
i gotta turn this nigga out
so he don't want nobody else (no)
but me and only me
as long as the pussy good
its alright
aint gotta worry about my man
cuz he knows ma's
is one of a kind
and that's why he keeps staying(stayin)
the pussy good
its alright
aint gotta worry about my man
cuz he know ma's
is one of a kind(come on)
and that's why he keeps staying
look ma
yea you got the bomb and work
that prissy stuff
glad it aint the gushy stuff
(that cushy stuff?)
I don't like the mushy butts
i wish we was
like puffy over jennifer
him and her
too much like i and we
(and what that mean?)
We just love the booty
all we see in 3d is um
booty, booty, booty, booty
oh really
do me, do me, do me, do me
run through me like fluid go through an iv
that's good imma make sure you never will leave
can i put my booty booty
up in your spaghetti?
Daddy
are you ready for sacary from me
pussy gushy mushy what more you want from me
cuz my feelins hit the ceiling what you want me to be
oh please pussy dont mess it up for me
c'mon
pussy don't fail me now (fail me now)
i gotta turn this nigga out
so he don't want nobody else(nobody else)
but me and only me
pussy don't fail me now (fail me now)
i gotta turn this nigga out
so he don't want nobody else
but me and only me(ohhh)
missy speaking:
pussy don't fail me now
i gotta turn this nigga out
so he don't want nobody else
but me and only me
pussy dont fail me now
i wanna turn this nigga out
so he dont want no body else
but me and only me
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